I just finished a 6-week
sub gig at Lindbergh High School, filling in for a teacher on maternity leave.
That it has taken me a week to put this blog-entry to bed is just one
indication of how tired I was at the end of the job. Thanks to Ronni Zagora for
trusting me with her kids. It was a pleasure and an honor.
I am embarrassed at just
how quickly I had forgotten just how much work teaching is.
This was not that tough a gig (3 AP USHistory & 1 General
Psychology), with an already prepared calendar and assessments (for the
history) and an enviable schedule. (Hint: subbing for the department chair is
probably a good strategy if you can manage it.) I used to be critical of
teachers-turned-administrators who began making demands on their staff. “Don’t
they remember how tough this job is?” I would snarl to myself, or anyone else
within earshot. Sorry about that, and for not always recognizing that their
job is also hard.
I hope you’re not
expecting some critical expose of public schools in general or Lindbergh in
particular. I have not one bad, or even critical, thing to say about my
experience there. One thing about subbing (or guest speaking): If the students
respect the teacher in whose classroom you're working, you'll almost certainly
have a good day (or in my case, 6 weeks).
The kids were fantastic;
I didn’t have even a sniff of anything that could be called a discipline
problem. The students were respectful and at least responsive, if not always
super motivated. They were, after all, high school juniors and seniors (and
seniors, especially this time of year, are pretty much done). It took a couple
days for me to get my “sea-legs” back (perhaps not the most apt metaphor for a
school with an airborne mascot), but I was teaching in my wheelhouse and
quickly found my rhythm.
Nor did the kids didn’t
seem to mind the passive learning to which they were subjected. I did thank
them for their patience on the last day of the “Berndt Talking Tour.” I mean,
anyone who knows me knows that if I can do one thing, it’s talk. Press
the “On” button and away I go. I remember showing an early baby
picture of Nicci, and having one student say, “She looks just like you, her mouth
is open.” I’d have been more insulted had it not been so true.
The social studies
faculty (with whom I had the most contact) were incredibly warm and welcoming.
Even though I’m (still) an introvert, I quickly felt a comfortable kinship. And
once I was able to find my way to the office without a Sherpa or leaving
breadcrumbs, I also had pleasant, helpful encounters with the support staff.
Everyone struck me as competent, although if I really met an administrator, I
don’t remember him/her. I’m excited for my former student, and my current
friend, Dr. Eric Cochran, as he takes over the (challenging) principal job next
year. I’m confident he’ll be great.
One thing I learned, or
at least reinforced, is that I absolutely made the right call a couple years
ago when I submitted my final letter of retirement and decided my time had
come. I had only a few misgivings at the time, and none now. I’m glad I did not
dishonor the profession of which I am so proud to have been a part by coasting
to the end of my career for another year or two. I’m proud of that career and
what I accomplished in it. However, I’m also proud that I recognized when it
was time to go, not because I was lazy or had lost my dedication or skills, but
because I knew that I no longer had the energy to do the job the way I believe
it needs to be done, and, more importantly, the way kids deserve to have it
done.
When talking about my
decision to really retire, I previously used the party-host analogy. I’m
updating that analogy to fast-food. As a sub, even a long-term sub, I was the
teaching equivalent of fast food. The kids didn’t starve, but what our patrons
(students) need are nutritious, home-cooked meals. I’ll do in a pinch, but even
with a selection of “healthy choices” on the menu, it’s not in anyone’s best
interests to subsist on fast food.
I may have more to say
down the road, as I make generalizations about teaching and education from this
added perspective, but I had a great time at an excellent school and I’m
grateful to Keith Cochran for thinking (and taking care) of me and recruiting
me to spend time with him and the Flyers. Based on my experience, I have no
doubt that these young men and women will truly soar.
