Friday, March 14, 2014

Random Questions — Mostly Rhetorical


• Spring Formal and Prom season is around the corner. I recently ate a restaurant where a large high school aged group was partaking of their pre-dance repast, so I have to ask: Do all stores carry the Julia Roberts Pretty Woman line of dresses or just selected boutiques? Did the girls really need those dresses to impress the dorky boys who were with them? Don’t those girls have mothers and/or fathers who saw them out the door and perhaps even took pictures? Just wow.
• How often do school administrators need to be reminded that they were appointed, not anointed?
• I think there are gold medals available if the Olympics adds “Racing to Stop Signs” as an event.... Is it only in St. Louis that people are practicing already? Is it a sign that I am finally becoming less competitive when this more amuses than annoys me?
• Would you rather eat at Bates City BBQ (real place) or the Sweeney Todd Diner (fictional)?
• Am I the only one for whom just the thought of the softball/baseball season makes me warmer?
• Is it because it’s just too hard to bend over that I see so many senior men wearing shoes without socks?
• So if the young who think they don’t need health insurance because they’re, well, mostly healthy, really DO get sick or injured, who pays the bill if they aren’t covered?
• Am I alone in not liking to follow Prius drivers? (This question is unrelated to the one on Stop Signs.)



Sunday, March 9, 2014

Administrative Relations


There are probably a variety of reasons why I made most, if not all, of my administrators nervous over the course of my career. Lately I’ve been asked why I’m not subbing at the school from which I just retired, and answering those questions got me thinking, because I would have enjoyed staying in touch with my kids from last year, whom I love and miss. 
A propensity for (often) public expression of (usually accurate) assessments of people and situations was certainly one. Anecdote: Superintendent* is giving his welcoming speech to open the school year. He advises teachers that if they have a problem, they should first go to their principal. If the principal doesn’t know the answer, he assured us that his door was always open. Then, his punchline: “And if I don’t know, go see Mr. Berndt, because he knows everything!” Remains the most complimentary insult I ever received. (I took that right, didn’t I?)
I had an elementary principal (for whom I didn’t work) tell me, “It’s one thing to be a big fish in a small pond, but you’re a ¡#☢¿☠§ whale!” When I made the move from the classroom to the guidance office at what seemed then to be the end of my teaching career, the outgoing superintendent said, “You know you weren’t my choice for this job.” Notice he didn't say “my first choice” or even “second choice.” Just not any kind of choice, and I was the only applicant!
As a teacher my opening speech covered my classroom rules. It usually went something like this: “I don’t like rules. I have trouble following rules myself. If I wanted rules, I’d find a job in law enforcement or religion [both of which generated negative scores on a career inventory test]. You all know right from wrong. Do what you know is right, do your job, we’ll get along fine.” We generally did, but I wanted administrators to treat me the same way. Less successful in that desire.
The principal with whom I worked best, and for whom I may have done my best work, was smart or intuitive enough (or both) to co-opt me onto his leadership team. It wasn’t just one of those pretend jobs, either. Too many people who say they want you to “think outside the box” really mean, “Think inside my box.” Not the case with Jerry Schloss. That lack of tension did nothing to stifle my creativity, because I’m the first to admit I sometimes benefited from needing to “push back” against authority.
Way back in the day I wrote a weekly column opining on what was going on in the School District of Hancock Place. I used a variety of mastheads over the years: a cannon, a poker hand, a bull. Each went with an appropriate column title, but, in retrospect, it occurs to me that each also carried with it an element of chaos or unpredictability: loose cannon, concealed cards and surprise revelations, the proverbial china shop. So I can see why I wouldn’t have always been a popular guy in the offices of the schools where I worked.**
The more an administrator needs to control things, well, I admit it, I’m a control freak’s worst nightmare. Worse yet, I’m proud of it!  

   *Roger Brodbeck, whom I consider to be a friend, although, like most of my friendships, one that took some time to develop.

** Esoteric literary reference for those familiar with John Sandford’s crime novels and his character of Virgil Flowers. I had a similar adjectival nickname in the superintendent’s office my last year. Don’t worry if you don’t get this. You could probably Google it if you’re that curious.