No Fan of Big Buts

I’m not a fan of big buts, because “but” contradicts the initial premise. Have you ever heard, or perhaps even said:

• I’m not prejudiced but …

• I’m not a racist but …

• I’m not sexist but …

• I don’t want to hurt your feelings but …

• No offense but …

• I don’t have anything against gays but …

• I believe in freedom of religion but …

But… Wait for it …. You are now going to hear (or say) something prejudicial, racist, sexist, hurtful, offensive, homophobic, anti-Muslim, anti-Semitic, etc., etc., etc. So, in fact, whoever starts with that phrase is, in fact, what they just said they’re not.

The “Big But” is an easy trap to fall into, trying to deny reality when it’s inconvenient. We’ve all done it, although I hope not in exactly the ways described above. A disturbing number of people have used, and continue to use, the “easy way out” by sharing, liking, retweeting, etc. to express racist views. Most would, of course, deny being prejudiced; after all, they’re just nodding at or reposting something someone else said. 

Sorry, not sorry: if you endorse a position you are also, by extension, endorsing the person(s), for better or worse, who offered the opinion. You can’t take a single quote from Adolf Hitler (or Vladimir Putin) and pretend that nothing else he said or did matters.

Charlottesville is my Rubicon. I’ve tried hard, really hard, to give people the benefit of the doubt for the last year and a half. No more. Put me in coach, I’m ready to play. Appropriating an appropriate phrase, “Never again.” Because, when you say, “I’m not defending the Nazis but….” and it’s followed by deflecting to another group or minimizing criticism of those hateful people and groups, wait for it, YOU ARE DEFENDING NAZIS. No, there are no good Nazis, there are no good people who accept or associate with Nazis. Those who defend Nazis are Nazi collaborators and no better than Nazis themselves.

I’ll go even further. I will never again use the phrase “alt-right,” because it’s nothing more than a euphemism to sanitize evil. Instead I’m going for the more accurate phrase: “fucking Nazis.” Because that is what the alt-right is.

If you, in any way, defend the the bullies of the so-called alt-right, you dishonor my father who fought them in World War II and was wounded working to defeat that evil. You threaten people whom I hold dear and are part of my soul. You threaten society as we know it. If you defend, or rationalize, or mitigate evil, you, too, are evil and stained in the same way.

I will, tepidly, and fighting back nausea, defend your first amendment rights (as well as those who use those same rights trying to block or counter the hatred you spew – and should you show up in St. Louis, I will be there with them), but know this: you are a despicable human being and I won’t bat at an eye or lift a finger when karma pays you a biting visit. There is no big but. I’m done.

Rule #23 – Stereotyping Victimizes Both the Typer and the Typee

Here at Lindbergh High School, Student Council elections are in full swing, with lots of posters on the walls touting various candidates. Wit and word play abound. A couple of boys in my AP Gov’t. class created a clever poster playing off the Donald Trump campaign slogan: “Make Lindbergh Great Again.” They have encountered some of the same hostility that supporters of Mr. Trump have, with blasts on social media, posters torn down, etc. While I suspect they may actually support Mr. Trump’s candidacy, I also know, having talked to them, that their poster (see below) also represents a tongue in cheek approach to their campaign. I also expect they will be trounced just as badly as the candidate they used as a model will be (of course, I never would have predicted that he could be the presumptive nominee, so my prognosticator credentials are open to debate), at least in part because they don’t have a vilified opponent.

But it made me think. Supporting Donald Trump’s presidential campaign does NOT make make someone a racist, misogynist, or any other label ascribed to the candidate. Neither does supporting Bernie Sanders make his enthusiasts freeloading socialists looking for a handout. All the calls to put Hilary Clinton behind bars ignore the minor detail of presumed innocence on which our justice system is founded. To demean the supporters of any candidate, to stereotype them in any way, is both insulting and inaccurate. People have valid reasons for their support of their candidate, whomever that is or may have been, and there is no reason to gratuitously insult their thinking.

You want to make snarky comments or post mean-spirited memes about a candidate? Well, I doubt that is an effective strategy, but the candidates knew what they were in for when they started running and I don’t feel any sympathy for them in the least. However, I’m also willing to give them the benefit of the doubt (and, honestly, I DO have significant doubt in almost every case) that they are running because they believe that they can lead the country in what they see as the right direction. They are not evil (well, maybe with the exception of Ted Cruz – just kidding – mostly), but flawed human beings who want to serve their nation. (I even acknowledge that for Senator Cruz.)

This is going to be an ugly election. I’m going to be more thankful than ever for DVR and digital music sources. I’ve made this point before, but I worry about the next 4 years, because whoever becomes President will go into office being, not just opposed, but despised by almost half the country. That’s a bad enough problem without compounding it by transferring that aggression (and we’re not talking micro-aggression here) to the people who are supporting and voting for our eventual leader.

     We must respect the office, if not the office holder; more importantly, we must respect each other. If we lose those pieces, we’re in even bigger trouble than you think we already are, no matter where you stand on the political spectrum. 

On the Eve of the State of the Union...

… which I won’t watch, again. As little point as I see in using my time listening to political punching and counter-punching, from a lame duck president this reality-TV drama seems an even bigger waste of my time. Then tonight and tomorrow we’ll be treated to being forced choose which narrow slice of right or left wing real estate we’re going to inhabit.

I never liked forced choice questions, A or B, True or False, Good or Evil. I don’t live in a black and white world; mine is a (fuzzy) shades-of-grey world-view. Thus, I find there are no easy answers and am increasingly suspect of those who claim to have a monopoly on the truth, be they Islamic radicals or Fundamentalist Christians, right-wing Republicans or left-wing Democrats, Clint Eastwood or Michael Moore …..

Life is no longer simple (if it ever was), probably (at least in part) because people are complicated. Seldom, if ever, do we really have an either/or situation, at least when it comes to how we feel about something. While our personal choices may often appear to be a forced choice, if we’re honest with ourselves we’ve had a variety of paths to take before arriving at H-Hour.

Why do I have to go “all in” on an issue? Are you really telling me I can’t support both the 2^nd Amendment and background checks? That I must pick between the 1^st Amendment freedom of (pick one of the 5) and reasonable limits that protect society? Can I not support the police and those who are concerned about whether “black lives matter”? Can I not appreciate the service and sacrifice of our military men and women and have concerns about where and why they are deployed?

On these big issues we seem to be at the mercy of the absolutists and extremists who take no prisoners, admit no middle ground; they manipulate issues and events trying to force the majority of us into their particular small corners. We are also at the mercy of those political consultants who energize voters and contributions by polarizing every issue. And we wonder why Congress can’t find any middle ground?

I almost envy those who live in their narrow black and white worlds. It cuts down on listening, thinking, analyzing, concluding. I’ll finish by sharing a meme that has been posted by both conservatives AND liberals and the cartoon (above) that seems to sum it all up.* Have we finally found something we can all agree on? Nah….

* You might also try to check the cartoon on the mast-head.